Monthly Archives: August 2016

To Teach is to Touch a Life Forever

parenting, Raising kids

Train up a child…

 

“To Teach is to Touch a Life Forever”

 

How we all depend on our teachers! The bumper sticker that says, “Teaching is the profession that makes all other professions possible” is certainly true. As school starts, every parent of a student is probably wondering, “Will my child have a good teacher?”

What most people don’t stop and think about is the fact that parents are teachers, too! From the time that first cry is heard at birth, parents become teachers whether they want to be or not. It is not a question of whether a parent is a teacher. Rather it is a question as to the kind of teacher that parent is.

There are those parent-teachers who simply cannot face the responsibility and choose to abandon their God-given gift and opportunity to touch a life in a positive way forever. Some parent-teachers blindly jump in and meander through their new responsibility hoping all will turn out well. There are parent-teachers who try to shove their responsibilities to someone else. Many children are now being raised by grandparents instead of parents. But blest are the parent-teachers who do all they can to become better teachers, so they do not leave matters to chance or to someone else. They take advantage of training available. They see that their children get a variety of experiences. They read about rearing children. In short, they work hard to be good teachers of the children they brought into the world.

Missouri started a program called Parents as Teachers that has become popular nationwide. Parents may work in the program to get training that will help both the children and themselves. Services provided by Parents as Teachers (PAT) include personal visits, parent group meetings, screenings, and networking with other agencies. The personal visits may be waived if some do not feel comfortable having someone visit the home. The screenings assess the child’s overall development as well as checking hearing and vision. Parent meetings are held one time each month. PAT works with women who are pregnant until the child reaches age 5. Studies show that children involved in this program have greatly benefited. Information about the PAT program may usually be obtained by contacting the local school.

“As the twig is bent, so grows the tree”. In the first few years of a child’s life, children learn more and at a faster pace than any other time. As a parent, you are your child’s first and foremost teacher. Parents are the ones who most touch the lives of their children forever.

 

 

Challenges of High School Seniors

Uncategorized, , ,

Train up a child…

Challenges of High School Seniors

Across the nation there are thousands of young people getting ready to enter their senior year of high school. There are those who are scared about what the future holds. Others are perhaps overly confident and can’t wait to get away from home and out from under the rules of home and constant watch and care of parents. Still others enter their senior year of high school partially aware of the challenges ahead and with a firm foundation that gives them peace inside that whatever the future holds, their faith and family will be there to guide them.

I dare say that most young people entering their senior year are really quite frightened. Of course, it isn’t “cool” to show this fear, so they often bluff by being loud and boisterous. Their fear is compounded every time someone asks, “What are you going to do when you get out of school?” That is why I try to never ask that question. Most young people feel that they must give an answer and will say the name of a career that they are not really sure about. It is much better, in my opinion, to say, “Are there some careers you are considering?” This does not pin the student down and leaves the person free to change his/her mind. Too many times, when a student is pinned down, that student feels an obligation to follow through on what has been said. A career path may be chosen simply to save face when that may not have been the best choice.

Parents can help alleviate fears in children by not putting undue pressure on them to make a definite decision in a certain time frame. Rather, parents can help by making sure the young person has the opportunity to take aptitude tests and gain the knowledge of careers available and the requirements for those careers. Right now, the demand for nurses is high nationwide. We can be assured that whether or not healthcare undergoes changes, there will be a big need for people in that field. High school counselors can help students find what they are best suited for.

There are, unfortunately, those students entering their senior year who haven’t a clue as to what lies ahead. Many actually refuse to think about a future, almost in denial that they will have to make important decisions. Their only thought is on fun and getting through the year with the unrealistic expectation that life will be rosy once they get away from rules and discipline. Our society has fostered the notion that everyone will be taken care of with no regard to past behavior. Some homes have fostered this notion as well. From kindergarten until now, some students have been passed from grade to grade whether or not they met requirements for each grade. It is no surprise that they may feel that everything will be all right whether or not they do anything about it. Some way, some how, these students must be brought to face reality.

Thankfully, there are those students entering their senior year who have been coached by parents and know that our country is not in great shape right now, and that nothing is guaranteed. Families who have worked together as a team have instilled the confidence that the family is always there for support. There was a time when parents told children, “When you are eighteen, you can start taking care of us!” There is nothing in the Bible to indicate that we ever stop being parents. We should always do the best we can for our children. There comes a time when total monetary support should end, but prayer support should never end.

One suggestion I would like to make is that seniors use this year to catch up on math if they need to. Nationwide, many high school graduates are being required to take remedial math when they go on to college. They get no college credit for remedial math and it is costing money to take it. They will save time and money to make sure they are where they should be in math upon graduation.

It would be good if all of us would do everything we can to encourage our high school seniors. They have a tough road ahead of them.

 

The Value of Homework

Raising kids, , , ,

Train up a child…

 

The Value of Homework

 

Homework is a good thing. No matter how much students may moan or groan about it, there is no doubt that it is good for them. Of course it is important to have the right amount of assignments. It is not good to overload students, but if the right amount of homework is given, there are many benefits derived for the student.

Homework is necessary to give practice of skills taught in school. Teachers do not have enough time to give adequate practice. More and more topics are added for teachers to teach, yet nothing is ever subtracted and no additional time is allowed. Homework is good to help the students develop proper habits of study and self-discipline. As parents either assist or observe their children doing homework, they come to a better understanding of the learning ability and achievement levels the children possess.

There was a time in education that educators thought that if a child simply understood subject matter, practice was not necessary. I remember having a math textbook when I taught second grade that required the children to complete as few as six problems each day after the concept was taught. I knew that the children needed more, so I kept extra math papers available all the time for the children to choose and work as their time permitted. Math, reading, and writing are skills. All skills require practice because they involve more than understanding. They involve the use of nerves and muscles. Just because a person can read and understand music, for instance, doesn’t mean that the person can play the piano or any other instrument. It is the same with the skills of reading, math, and writing. Practice is necessary to become proficient.

As I taught GED classes through the years, I found that many students test higher in applied math than the actual computation. I tell them that I suspect they sat in class, listened to the teacher explain how to do problems, and then said, “I don’t have to do my homework. I understand that.” They usually look at me rather sheepishly and say, “You got that right. How did you know?” Such students indicate that they have the ability to understand but did not practice problems enough to be able to do them satisfactorily.

Some children do well in early grades and don’t do homework, then find out later on that some subjects, such as algebra, require constant homework. Unfortunately, since they didn’t do homework early on, they haven’t really learned good study habits and self discipline to buckle down and do what they need to do. It is important to have a set time, even in the lower grades, to make homework a habit. If homework is not assigned, the parents need to come up with things the children can do to add to what they are learning in school. For instance, if the children are learning about conservation, they might require them to look at or read something from the Missouri Conservation magazine. They can check the library for more information or take a walk with dad to see examples of good and bad conservation.

Some may think that their children don’t need to do any homework since they finish quickly at school. We should never let our children think that they are smarter than others and that they don’t need to learn more. There is always plenty more to be learned about every subject. Parents are teachers, too, and parents need to help children develop a curiosity for learning by making suggestions or finding projects for the children to do to enrich what they have already learned.We learn a great deal about our children as they do homeworkPerhaps we learn even more than any report card can show. We can assess how the child reasons, the interests of the child, and become closer to the child. Homework can be a wonderful together time and learning time for both parents and children.

 

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How to Talk so Kids can Learn

Raising kids, , ,

Train up a child…

 

How to Talk so Kids Can Learn

 

People do not like to be yelled at! Children are people, too. Children do not like to be yelled at!

The way we talk to children greatly affects their learning. Our tone and volume of voice is very important as we relate to the little ones. We need to take the time, whenever possible, to explain and reason with children.

I have observed over the years that many parents constantly bark orders to children, often so rapidly that the children do not have time to mentally process one order before being given another. When this happens, children become resentful, confused, embarrassed, and often give up trying to obey. They may pout or act out in frustration. They hurt inside because they feel that the one yelling at them does not love them. It becomes even more confusing when, after barking orders to the children, a few minutes later that same parent may say, “I love you”. This scenario gives an untrue example of love. Love is patient. On the other hand, if we slow down, take time to let the child process instructions, and explain where needed, the child calms down, is more likely to obey, and senses love as shown through patience. Sometimes a parent will get better results to simply go to the child, put an arm around that child, and whisper instructions slowly.

Children can often understand more than we give them credit for if we take the time to give the explanations in words they understand. We forget that they do not have the same vocabulary that we have. They increase their vocabulary as we explain why we expect them to do certain things. When they have the understanding, they are more apt to act appropriately on their own when parents are not around. Many believe that if they just get their children in the habit of doing certain things that they will grow up and maintain those habits. Habits only go so far. Understanding of reasons for acting appropriately will extend the correct behavior. There comes a time in a child’s life when that child begins to question what parents have told them. If they have the basic understanding of the “whys”, they are more apt to stick with what they have been taught.

The use of questions instead of statements is so very important in helping children reason out the “whys” of behavior. Telling is not teaching! When we ask questions, a child is forced to think. Following are some examples of common questions that can be asked in various situations:

  • How would Bob feel if you told him that?
  • What would happen if you did that?
  • What were you thinking when you did that?
  • What do you think Susan was thinking when she did that?
  • Why do you want to do that?
  • How would the people around you feel if they heard you say that?

These are just general questions to help a child think through his/her actions before making a decision. They also help to develop empathy and teach decision-making.

Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish wrote a book titled, How to Talk so Kids Can Learn. I highly recommend it. It is available on Amazon.com and is also available in the Kimberling Area Library. Although I do not agree with everything in the book, it certainly helps us rethink how we are talking to our children.