Tag Archives: raising kids

Sometimes Dad’s “Got No Respect”

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Sometimes Dad’s “Got No Respect”!

       It is too bad that sometimes dad does not have the respect he should have in his family.  I’m sure he feels like Rodney Dangerfield at times when he would say, “I got no respect!”  No matter what kind of dad he is, dad deserves a certain amount of respect simply because he is dad.  However, there are many things he can do to make respecting him easier for all with whom he comes in contact.  Following is a list of suggestions:

  • Dad, say what you mean and mean what you say.  When you tell a child to do something and then don’t follow through to see that it is done, the child thinks you will forget it the next time and he/she can get by without obeying.
  • Don’t make promises you may not be able to keep.  Learn to say, “I will try to do ______” instead of “I will do ______”.
  • Show respect to the children and their mom.  You will get respect in return.
  • Be kind and gentle to mom.  The kids are watching how you treat her.  If you mistreat her, they think they can mistreat her also.  They love their mom and will resent anyone hurting her.  They will respect you for being patient with her and treating her nicely.
  • Speak kindly of neighbors and acquaintances.  
  • Honor your debts.  Pay bills quickly and try not to be indebted to others.
  • Discipline the children out of love and concern, not anger.  They know the difference.  When you discipline with anger, it is because you are thinking of how you have been inconvenienced, not what is best for the child.
  • Spend time with the children and take interest in their activities at school and church.
  • Be quick to say “I’m sorry” when you have done wrong. False pride causes us to think we will be disrespected if we admit weakness, but actually the opposite is true.  
  • Be honest in all business dealings.  The kids are watching.
  • “Take the bull by the horns” and be the spiritual head of your household.  Make sure the family goes to church.
  • Remember birthdays.  Do whatever it takes to help you remember even if it means putting notes on the bathroom mirror.
  • Practice what you preach.  “Do as I say and not as I do” doesn’t work.

         How often do we hear, “Kids show no respect anymore”?  One of the reasons some children do not respect parents and other adults is that we do not do the things necessary to earn that respect.  We can each improve in this area.

Dad Reflects God to Children

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Barnes & Noble, Amazon, www.patlambchristianauthor.com )

Train up a child…

Dad Reflects God to Children

         Everyone who believes in God has an image in mind of what He is like.  The mental image we have of our Heavenly Father is greatly determined by the image we have of our earthly father.  Children naturally associate the word “father”.  They reason that what one father is like, the other father is probably also like. 

         If children have a father who has left the family and is not meeting his responsibilities, they are likely to decide that God, the Heavenly Father, cannot be trusted.  If they have had trust placed in their dad betrayed, why should they believe that any other father can be trusted?

         Children may have an earthly father who has not left the family physically, but who does not meet his responsibilities in the home.  This situation can have the same or similar effect of the father who has left the home.  They again see an individual who cannot be relied upon.

         If dads have unreasonable expectations of children and are too strict with them, children may develop an image of God as a stern taskmaster who will not love them if they make a mistake.  If they never seem to please their earthly dad, they may reason that they will never measure up to God’s expectations and simply give up without trying. They may fear punishment from God to the extent that they want to avoid Him.

         When dad fails to express verbally his love for his children, they may not believe that God really loves them.  

         If dad is always “goofing off” and everything is fun and games to him, children may not develop a sense of seriousness about what the Heavenly Father expects from them.  Dismissing all actions of children and not holding them accountable for those actions may result in children feeling that God will let them get by with anything

         If dad doesn’t think it is important to study the Bible and go to church, the children will probably think that God is not important enough to spend time on and give attention to in worship.

         If, however, dad is a godly man who truly loves his children in a scriptural way, children will probably grow up realizing the importance of God in their lives and want to serve and worship Him.

What an awesome responsibility to be a dad!  Truly, children not only walk in dad’s footsteps, but they form their lifelong beliefs by dad’s behavior.  If we adults truly examine our image of God, we will probably find that at least part of it is similar to our earthly father.  Fortunately, Bible study can correct much of the negative views of God as we read about God’s true characteristics.  The sad truth is that when children have been raised with wrong attitudes, they may never seek the truth and may never learn the difference in order to form a correct image of God.  

There is no doubt that dad sets the tone of the home.  He is designed to be the head of the home and whether or not he consciously accepts that designation, there are results of his behavior that cannot be avoided.  It is not a matter of do as I say and not as I do in raising children. Good examples produce good outcomes. Bad examples produce unwanted outcomes.  Our children are with us for such a short time in the whole scheme of our lives.  While they are young, we need to be willing to give up personal pleasures and do all we can to obtain the tools we need to raise our children with a realistic image of God.     

A Good Mother Uses Time Wisely

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: “Let the Children Come”; “Children, Come to Me”; “When the Stars Fall Down”; “Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way”; “My Thinking Book”. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambhristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

A Good Mother Uses Time Wisely

Whether we are rich, poor, handsome, short, tall, educated, or uneducated, we all have one thing in equal amounts.  That one thing is time.  We each have 24 hours each day.  How we use those hours determines whether we are a success or failure in life.  The way mothers use their time may determine whether their children become a success or a failure.  Mothers should try to stay busy, make their busy-ness count positively, and protect their time from being stolen by others who would pressure them to do things that are not productive for their husband and children.

         The 31st chapter of the book of Proverbs in the Bible describes the “perfect” woman.  In the 27th verse of that chapter we read that a good woman “does not eat the bread of idleness”.  One result of modern day conveniences is that we have more time on our hands.  It is tempting to allow ourselves to be idle since we are not required to do as much physical work as our mothers had to do.  I have heard so many women say that they eat too much because they are bored. As a result, they then worry about being overweight.  This is especially true of mothers whose children have left home.  The Bible does not say that we stop being mothers when the children reach a certain age.  We are mothers as long as our children are living. Even if our children are far away, we can still e-mail them or write words of encouragement, make gifts for them and their children, find appropriate books and information to help them, or do many other things to promote their well-being.  We need to keep busy being a good mother no matter what the age of the children. Idleness truly does breed contempt.  An idle person is usually not a happy person.  Physical exercise produces an enzyme that fights depression.  We need to stay as active as we can, doing productive activities. Also, there are plenty of other children around that we can “mother” if our children or grandchildren are not near us.

         It is important to choose activities that are beneficial to children. When mothers read to children, it is wise to choose books that not only entertain, but also teach good values.  I like to “kill two birds with one stone” whenever possible.  Some books and games have little value for children while others have great value.  Why waste time on something worthless when so much can be accomplished with worthwhile activities.  One of the very best ways to use time well is to allow children to assist with work.  This provides time for bonding as well as teaching children how to care for personal belongings. Children and parents can be side-by-side in work and play.

         There are many things that would steal our time.  Even good things can keep us from doing better things.  There may be good TV shows, but we need to ask ourselves whether they are actually worth the time they take by producing positive benefits for our family.  Many organizations plead for help from mothers and many of those organizations have worthwhile causes.  If we try to be helpful in too many of them or in too many ways to any one of them, we may be allowing them to steal time that would be better spent with our children. 

         Time passes far too quickly to waste it.  When our children are small, it may seem like forever until they grow up and are on their own.  Those of us who are older know that the time when they are home and we have greater influence on them is so very short in relation to the time when they are away.  My husband and I have been married fifty years and most of that time has been spent together after the children have left home. That is true of many other couples as well. Mom, let’s make that short time count!   

When Does Mom Stop Being Mom?

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: “Let the Children Come”; “Children, Come to Me”; “When the Stars Fall Down”; “Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way”: “My Thinking Book”. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com.)

Train up a child…

When Does Mom Stop Being Mom?

       From the time a child is born, mom is the one always there to feed, clothe, snuggle, and protect the little baby.  Dad is there also, but it is mom who is the closest at the early stage of life in a child.  When the child cries, mom can usually even tell what kind of cry it is.  Is it a hungry cry, a hurt cry, or an angry cry?  Mom knows.  The baby understands that mom is the one who will provide the basic needs.  The baby’s world revolves around its mom and the baby thinks mom is the greatest thing in the world.

         When the child starts to kindergarten, that child begins to discover that there are other people in the world who can make it happy.  Many children have a special bond with their kindergarten teacher.  At this point in life, mom begins to take back seat.  Mom has to stand back a little as the child begins to discover the world.  What mom hasn’t shed a tear or two as the child heads out the door for its first day of school?

         As the child begins to approach puberty, mom suddenly becomes perhaps the dumbest person in the world.  It is almost impossible to do anything right that pleases the son or daughter.  This is a time when many moms suffer a great deal of pain as their child begins to reject them.  Mom knows, however, that the child is “sprouting its own wings” and she patiently waits and watches, interjecting guidance wherever possible to help that child she still loves dearly, in spite of the fact that at times it seems that the child has no love for her.

         When the young adult goes to college, that son or daughter begins to sense the meaning of homesickness.  A reevaluation of mom and dad takes place and by the time the child is out of college, several hundred dollars later, the young adult is surprised at how much mom has learned in those four years!  The young adult still feels, however, that mom is behind the times and is not fully able to understand current situations.

         Through the adult years, the son or daughter gradually begins to understand that maybe mom wasn’t so far off base after all.  Little by little, the adult starts seeking advice from the person once thought to be ignorant of all modern behavior. “I wonder what mom would do?” the adult thinks in tough situations. “I’ll talk it over with her.”

         Finally, the time comes for mom’s life on this earth to end.  Mom is no longer there to go to for advice.  The son or daughter is now completely on its own unless dad is still around.  When tough situations come along, the individual thinks, “I wonder what mom would have done.  What would mom tell me to do?  I wish I could talk it over with her.”

         And in the coming years, the memory of mom’s words and actions still exist to help guide the child in decision-making.

         When does mom stop being a mom?  Never! The effects of her mothering are exhibited in grandchildren and great grandchildren.  Her teachings are felt in generations to come.  Mothering is a wonderful opportunity that knows no end.

A Mother’s Love is Special

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by Pat Lamb (Author of “Let the Children Come”; “Children, Come to Me”; “When the Stars Fall Down”; “Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way”; “My Thinking Book”. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble; www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

A Mother’s Love is Special

         There are many heartwarming stories demonstrating the love of a mother for her children.  Much respect is deserved by those mothers of physically or mentally challenged children for the hours of patience and loving care they give.  Mothers seem to have a special something that fathers and others don’t have.  There is no disputing that fathers play a valuable role in the upbringing of their children, but mothers have a distinct nature for nurturing her children.  Both have an irreplaceable role as God intended when he planned for man and woman to unite to bring children into the world.  At this time of the year, our thoughts turn to mom. I recall three personal observations illustrating a mother’s love.

         When my husband and I were working with the Navajo in New Mexico and Arizona, we observed the love of the mothers for their children as they reluctantly brought them to the government boarding schools to live away from home to get an education.  The vast expanse of the reservation made it impossible to have schools nearby.  To give the children an education meant that most of them had to live in a dormitory. High school students had to go off the reservation to schools as far away as Oklahoma or Utah.  Mothers would come to the campus of our school with beautiful Navajo rugs they had woven.  They wanted to sell the rugs to get some money for their children who were going away. There were many times when we watched children cling to parents and parents to children, not wanting to let go and part from each other. Knowing the necessity of an education prompted the parents to do what only the love for a child would motivate them to do…walk off and leave the child in the hands of someone else to educate. 

         On one occasion in Ramah, NM, a little girl did not want to come to school.  Her mother knew how important it was for the child’s future. I was teaching second grade at the time and the little girl was in my class.  Her mother came carrying the girl, kicking and crying, and put her in my arms. The mother spoke very little English and I spoke even less Navajo, but the language of love is universal.  I nodded to her in understanding, took the little girl in my arms and carried her into the classroom where she immediately stopped crying. I later learned from the mother’s brother that the little girl, Karen, had jumped out of the pickup on the way to school, and started to run across the field and hide, so she wouldn’t have to come to school.  Her mother had jumped out of the moving pickup right behind her, climbed over a fence and taken off after her to catch her.  Her brother was laughing about how her squaw skirt and turquoise jewelry were flying as she climbed that fence. (She wore a full 3-tiered skirt like a square dance skirt but floor length and velvet blouse…the traditional dress of the Navajo women.)  Her brother laughed when he told us that she didn’t care what the tourists thought as they drove by on the busy highway, she was going to catch Karen and get her in school!

         Another example of a mother’s love was seen in Denver when I rode with a policeman one night as a project for a class I was taking in the psychology of prejudice. Shortly after we stopped at a convenience store for coffee, we received a call that a girl had been raped at that same store.  Since another car was in the vicinity, we didn’t pursue the case.  At the end of the tour, we went to the police headquarters.  I was curious as to what happened about the rape case, so the man I had ridden with asked the dispatcher to find out.  She communicated with the police car that had been assigned to the case.  The reply came back, “Male Caucasian, 6’4” tall, approximately 250 lbs., when last seen was being pursued by victim’s mother!”

         Yes, mothers have a special love for the welfare of their children.

Some Children are Self Smart

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Some Children are Self Smart

         “Still water runs deep” is an expression that is often used to describe a child who may be quiet and perhaps shy and doesn’t mind being alone.  This may very well be the child who has a dominant intrapersonal intelligence.

         Seven intelligences have been defined.  People are born with dominance in three or four of these intelligences.  The intelligences are known as verbal/linguistic, logical/mathematical, bodily/kinesthetic, spatial, musical, interpersonal, and intrapersonal.  Other names for these intelligences are word smart, numbers smart, body smart, picture smart, music smart, people smart, and self smart.

         Intrapersonal or self-smart is the capacity to understand oneself. This person can understand his/her own personal thoughts and feelings and use that knowledge to plan and direct his/her life.  Intrapersonal intelligence involves not only an appreciation of self, but also of the human condition and is evident in psychologists, spiritual leaders, and philosophers.

         The children who possess this intelligence to a strong degree may be thought of as “loners”. They don’t seem to mind being alone for extended periods of time. Sometimes parents worry unduly about these children for fear they may become anti-social when they are simply thinking about life and its meaning. They are usually in tune with their inner feelings, values, beliefs, and thinking processes.  These children may be “wise beyond their years”, can usually motivate themselves, and have intuition.  Since they spend much time in simply thinking, they may have well thought-out opinions on many issues.  Others often go to them for advice.  However, some may think of them as distant resulting in a small number of friends.

         Teachers would do well to give children who have this intelligence opportunities to describe their feelings or the feelings of others when essays are assigned. Any essay topic that asks for an opinion is a subject to be enjoyed by these children.  There will be an interest in the personalities of great mathematicians when studying math.  A parent or teacher might ask for a description of the feelings of others as history is studied because they like to imagine how people felt in various circumstances. 

         Job skills the intrapersonal person is likely to possess include working alone, setting goals and obtaining objectives, appraising, planning, initiating, and organizing.  This person is likely to be a self-motivator.  Jobs that these individuals seem to fit are clergyman or religious worker, psychologist, therapist, counselor, or entrepreneur.  At some point in time, they may want to write an autobiography.  They may not always be good in jobs where quick action is required because they like time to reflect and think before making a decision.  

         I am amazed when I think about the varying personalities that God created.  He knew what would be needed to sustain a society and he gave each of us unique ways of thinking and acting to meet those needs.  It would be so nice if each of us learned to appreciate the differences in people rather than expecting everyone else to think and feel as we do.  Ideally, we would all work together and compliment the skills and abilities of one another.    

Helping Children with Fear

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com.)

Train up a child…

Helping Children with Fear

Many people are experiencing fear at this time concerning the virus being talked about so much.  Children sense those fears and are trying to deal with them.  They need the help of adults to do so.  How can we help them?

It is helpful if children understand that there have been times in the past that have presented challenges with sicknesses.  They also need to understand that some things are permanent and some things are not.  They need the security of knowing that they have the love of parents and others that will never be taken away.

Others in my age category may remember the small pox and tuberculosis epidemics that came through the Ozarks many years ago.  Yes, many people died, but many survived.  Of course, travel was not so prevalent and the media not as effective in their influence as now.  Just as there have been times in the past, there will probably be more times in the future when we are challenged. 

Part of a child’s education should include the fact that life has no guarantees.  It is tempting to avoid such subjects because no one wants to upset a child with scary thoughts.  However, truth is truth and can’t be avoided.  When we hold back truth, the children will not be prepared later to deal with it.  It never helps to tell a child, “Everything will be alright.”  It is actually insulting a child’s intelligence to do so.  Children see fear in the faces of parents and others; they hear fear in the voices of reporters and others.  They know better.  

Most of all, children need the assurance from parents, grandparents, and others that no matter what happens, they will be loved and cared for to the extent that caretakers are able.  Love is something that can never be taken away.  Life is full of uncertainties.  Children need to know that the love of parents is certain.  

Give children lots of hugs.  Don’t lie to them.  They can tell when you are.  Be honest in the gentlest way possible, but always be truthful.  Teach them health habits to be used at all times, not just now.  Point out those things that never change such as God’s love.  Set a good example of calmness and thoughtfulness.  Point out the difference between truth and hype.  Teach children to be thrifty with supplies, food, etc.  Teach the value of prayer, for God is in control of all.  

Some Children are Picture Smart

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Some Children are Picture Smart

         We make a mistake as parents, teachers, and grandparents when we believe that children will act and respond in the same way that we do.  God created each of us uniquely and each person is born with dominance in particular intelligences.  That dominance influences the way we think and act.  Sometimes children are born with the same dominant intelligences as their parents, but often they are not.  

         Experts in the field of personality have isolated seven intelligences of humans.  They are verbal/linguistic, logical/mathematical, visual/spatial, musical/rhythmic, body/kinesthetic, interpersonal, and intrapersonal.  These intelligences are also known as word smart, numbers smart, picture smart, music smart, body smart, people smart, and self smart.

         Picture smart children are those who have a sense of spatial relationships.  They think in images and pictures. They are often aware of colors, shapes, objects, and patterns in their environment.  They have strong opinions about colors that go together, textures that are appropriate and pleasing, and decorating.  They can “see with the mind’s eye”.  They can pretend and imagine.  They are our artists.  

         When teaching children who are dominant in the spatial/ visual intelligence, we need to give many opportunities for graphing, drawing, working with clay or other mediums.  Using posters and charts will be the most effective way of presenting material.  They are definitely visual learners.  Appealing bulletin boards in classrooms are very effective.  Since they are good at “seeing with the mind’s eye”, they will be able to visualize scenes and act them out. Role-playing past times in history helps in reinforcing learning in history lessons.  Color coding parts of written material with highlighters is effective as well.  

         Children who are dominant in the visual intelligence may grow up to be an engineer, surveyor, architect, artist, graphic designer, photographer, inventor, pilot, layout editor, designer, interior decorator, or any career requiring skills such as drawing, painting, visualizing, creating visual presentations, graphing, or filming. 

         It is interesting to observe children for behavioral characteristics that are clues to dominant intelligences.  Many of the Navajo children that my husband and I were privileged to teach displayed dominance in spatial intelligence. I recall an incident while teaching second grade on the Navajo reservation when I asked the children to draw a picture about a field trip we had taken.  One little boy drew a school bus on a road with puffs of dust coming up from behind the exhaust.  There was a tree with a squirrel and bird in it watching the bus go by.  A little rabbit was peeking from behind the tree watching the bus.  Children were waving out the windows of the bus and the sun had a smile on its face.  I was astonished at so much detail in this one picture.  He was definitely picture smart.  Most Navajo children that I taught seemed to have the same love for art. Some children do well to draw a stick house with a tree and a sun.  When a young child puts a lot of detail in drawings, it is probably an indication that there is some dominance in the visual/spatial intelligence. 

         It is nice that we have different personality tendencies.  It certainly makes the world more interesting.  It is of great value to understand these characteristics of children in order to better prepare them for their future. 

Some Children Prefer Physical Activity

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Some Children Prefer Physical Activity

         Some children are “body smart”.  Experts tell us that we are all born with dominance in three or four of the seven intelligences.  The seven intelligences are:  verbal/linguistic, logical/mathematical, visual/spatial, body/kinesthetic, musical/rhythmic, interpersonal, and intrapersonal.  Other names for these intelligences are:  word smart, numbers smart, picture smart, body smart, people smart, and self smart.

         The dominance in “body smart” is displayed when children prefer physical activity over sedentary activity.  These children really go for sports or any physical activity such as dancing.  They often find it difficult to sit still for long lengths of time.  In adulthood, someone may say, “I couldn’t talk if my hands were tied behind my back!”  The movement of hands while talking is a clue to recognizing this intelligence.  This intelligence involves a sense of timing and the perfection of skills through mind and body union.  

         The teacher or parent would be wise to keep these children moving as much as possible.  They can act out stories, participate in drama, or be given opportunities to participate in sports or make display projects.  They like to work with their hands, and they should be given breaks often if they have to sit for very long.  Younger children could learn the alphabet by forming the letters in play-doh. “Body smart” children like water play and painting.  They like demonstrations to mimic rather than simply listening to instructions.  Physical games of all kinds appeal to these children.  Swimming is an excellent activity as it provides a real positive outlet for physical energy. 

         Other possible teaching activities for the bodily/kinesthetic child include acting out scenes from the past in charades to learn history, standing and turning 45, 180, or 360 degrees to learn the degrees in a circle, or making a healthy snack food and eating it to learn nutrition.  The possibilities are almost endless. 

         Children who are dominant in the “body smart” intelligence may grow up to be surgeons, physical education teachers, physical therapists, mechanics, actors, factory workers, nurses, house cleaners, or any career involving physical activity.

         The physically active child may seem to be a challenge to tired parents or teachers. I wonder if some of the children who have been diagnosed with attention deficit disorder may simply be children who are “body smart”.  Whether or not this is the case, these children need constant physical activity. With understanding and planning, the “body smart” children can be real assets. When the parent or teacher is tired, the active child probably wants to keep going.  We can have the child run errands and do some of the things we may not have the energy to do.  We simply need to keep something going for this child because if we don’t, the child will find something on his/her own.  I remember reading someplace, “Confucius say, ‘A child with something to do, him busy.  A child with nothing to do, him busy, too!’”

Music is Valuable for Children

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by Pat Lamb ( Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Music is Valuable for Children

         Of the seven intelligences, music is probably the most universal.  It seems that almost everyone has some musical intelligence.  Even those who say they “couldn’t carry a tune if they had it in a basket with a lid on it” probably enjoy listening to music.  There are, however, children who possess a real gift in this area.  We all know people whose love for music is so great that they almost live and breathe it.  Our oldest son, for instance, could hardly walk past our piano without sitting down and playing for a while.  There are those folks who can pick up almost any instrument and play it.  Occasionally, we meet those who “play by ear”.          Even very small children who have not yet learned to walk may be seen moving their bodies somewhat in rhythm to music. As soon as they learn to walk, many small children will make up and do little dances to rhythm. 

         The seven intelligences are linguistic, logical-mathematical, bodily-kinesthetic, spatial, musical, interpersonal, and intrapersonal.  Each person is born more dominant in some intelligences than others. Musical intelligence is the capacity to discern pitch, rhythm, timbre, and tone. It enables one to recognize, create, reproduce, and reflect on music.  Music connects with emotions.  Mathematical and music intelligences may share common thinking processes.

         Children with musical intelligence are often sensitive to sounds in the environment such as chirping of crickets, traffic, or rain on the roof.  They can often produce a melody after hearing it only once.  They are able to mimic sounds, language accents, and others’ speech patterns.  They can pick out different instruments in a musical composition.  

         It is important that all children are exposed to a variety of music.  In my opinion, all children should be given some music training.  Learning to read music is a real asset.  Studies have shown that children who have music training do better academically.  It is unfortunate that so many young people allow peer pressure to mold them into only one type of music.  One way to help avoid this is to expose children to different kinds of music when they are young.  When our four children were small, I had a collection of records that I played for them during their rest time.  The collection included classical as well as fun songs and stories put to music. Later, our oldest son played a great deal of classical music when he took piano lessons.  Each of our children seems to enjoy different kinds of music even now that they are grown.

         Making up lyrics to different tunes works well with children with the musical intelligence.  In kindergarten, some teachers make up songs about picking up toys and putting them away.  Interjecting a child’s name in the lyrics is fun.  It is amazing how the children seem to respond to the music as opposed to simply being told to pick up their toys and put them away.  When the child goes to school, multiplication tables put to tunes make it easier for the child to learn.  Many things that need to be memorized can be put to music.  Allowing the child to make up songs themselves will enhance learning.  

         It is unfortunate that there are not many opportunities for careers for music lovers.  Only the really gifted and dedicated can make a living from music.  I noticed while visiting in Europe, as we walked down the street in some places, we would pass perhaps two or three buildings where orchestras were playing.  It seemed to be possible there for more people who loved music to do it as a career; nevertheless, music is still very important for our own personal satisfaction and enjoyment here in America.  It provides a real outlet of expression of emotions whether we perform or just listen. We each need a song in the heart!