Train up a child…
Raising Compassionate Children
People who are compassionate do not want to hurt others. The bullying, murdering, and gossiping in the world would not exist if everyone were compassionate and truly cared for the feelings of others.
How can we help our children learn to be compassionate and grow up caring for the feelings of others? We need to start very early in their lives by fostering sympathy in tragic situations, giving practice in doing nice things for others, and setting the example of showing compassion.
Even very young toddlers can respond to exclamations they hear from others. A person can exclaim, “Poor puppy! He is hurt!” Such phrases and tone of voice instills in a small child a feeling of compassion. Finding a bird with a broken wing and nursing it is an example of showing compassion. Feeding a stray cat or dog is also an example of showing compassion.
As children grow older, taking part in programs such as Wounded Warrior certainly can make a lasting impression on a teen. Gathering items for the homeless or persons who are victims of disasters can be of benefit not only to the organization, but also to the participants. Disabled Veterans is another organization needing help where children can experience compassion. Many teens take part in serving Thanksgiving dinners to those who are alone on the holiday. Churches sponsor mission trips for teens to help on an Indian reservation or in a city to foster an understanding of the needs of others.
It is too easy for us to get involved in our own world and forget those around us. When we pull back from others and think only of ourselves, we lose compassion for others. Older adults should set the example of showing compassion through example in both word and deed.
The opposite of compassion is selfishness. We wonder why our young people do such terrible things that we hear almost daily on the news. One reason is that there is no feeling of compassion in those doing the injustice. Children become desensitized to violence. Violence is so commonplace that children almost take it for granted as a part of life, not realizing the hurt and pain the victims suffer. Some children have a difficult time separating fiction from reality. When they see so much violence on TV or in video games with no consequences for that violence, they become detached from the reality of pain and suffering. It is up to the parents, grandparents, church workers, and school workers to help make sure that the children understand the reality of the consequences of violence.
The brains of teenagers are not fully developed to understand risk. They often act on impulse without thinking through the consequences of their behavior. If we can instill a feeling of compassion in our children when they are young, when the chance for violence comes to the child, that child will automatically feel compassion and resist the hurting of others. Without compassion, there is no understanding of the hurt they may cause.
One of the most important things we can do to counteract the violence in our culture is to instill compassion in our children.