Train up a child…

Why do Children Lie?

When we are dealing with any problem with children, it is always helpful to try to understand what is behind that behavior. Most, if not all, children will tell a lie at some time or another, but some children seem to lie repeatedly and often. Why do they lie??
Some children tell untruths because they are afraid of the consequences of the truth. Some children try to make themselves look important. Some children are simply too lazy or don’t want to be bothered with explanations required by truth.
Children who come from homes of very strict discipline are often afraid of the consequences of things they have done. They lie, hoping that it will get them through the moment and parents will forget what they have done. If this is the case, parents need to loosen up and ensure the child that they will not be punished too severely. This does not mean that there should be no punishment. Most children expect punishment when they do wrong, but the punishment should not be so severe as to extremely frighten the child.
When children come from poverty-stricken homes or if they feel they don’t measure up to standards projected to them, they may lie to make themselves look more important. These are the children who often make up exaggerated stories of accomplishments or self-worth. Their self-esteem is so low that they try to correct it by making other people think they are better than they really feel they are. Some almost live in a fantasy world. These children need assurance of love for the way they are. If they can feel love, they don’t have to try to make themselves look like something different from who or what they are.
Some kids simply don’t want to deal with the truth. They may be busy having fun or making friends. When they are asked a question, they may simply say anything to get the parent “off their back”. These children need to be taught that it is wrong to lie. Some actually have never learned the Ten Commandments and don’t know that it is wrong to say something untrue. They take the easy road for immediate self-comfort. If the parent will stop them each time and wait for the correct answer, most children will soon learn that it is easier to tell the truth in the first place.
Most children have not learned to think ahead to realize that telling a lie may work for the moment, but will come back to haunt them later on. Older people have the experience to know this, but limited experience of young people does not provide for caution. Simply telling a child not to lie seldom works although they do need to be taught that it is wrong. It is much better to address the reasons behind the actions.